He's Only But An Oxford Comma.

"She straightens her hair, puts on her eyeliner, glosses her lips & takes one last look in the mirror, all for the boy who will never care."

It was a somewhat chilly night when a horrible feeling came ever me- no not a feeling: a want. The kind of want that won't let you ignore it. The kind of want that drives you insane until the deed is finally done. The kind of want that makes you drive five minutes down the road, grab the closest tub of Half Baked Ben & Jerry's ice cream, and settle down on the coldest, hardest bathroom floor in your house with the wholliest blanket you can find. The kind of want that you better hope you wore waterproof mascara for. The unfortunate desire that only one species can bring about: boys (or girls).

Yep. That's right. I'm talking about the bathroom floor moment- something that we all know too well. Early on this summer, everyone was looking for a summer fling. 

A summer fling, noun;

A sexual adventure free of hassles, commitments, or drama. Timed for the summer only. Something light and fun-filled with nothing to worry about at the end of the season. Usually not exclusive to one person, ends in a mutual agreement of friendship.

While this seemed like a great option in the beginning, we all know how these typically end. The "mutual agreement of friendship," typically doesn't end up that way. Feelings are developed, and someone has to end the commitment free french kisses. With college knocking at all of our doorsteps, many couples are also figuring out that a relationship is not the kind of baggage they want while partying it up at frat houses and studying.

All of these questions start swarming in your head:

Where did you go wrong? 

Why did he/she leave you? 

Why did you develop feelings?

How did you allow this to happen?

Why does this always happen?

Well, I'm here to tell you ladies and gents that everyone's been there. Now you just need to add the "done that." Thus, here is a serious discussion on not letting this moment define you.

This Is Not Your Fault

First things first, who is to blame? In the moment, your answer to that question was probably somewhere along the lines of, "myself." Well, let's get that idea out of your system right now. Fault is a two-way track in which you are placed on one train and they are placed on the other. Nothing is just "your fault." The grass isn't always greener on the other side- they are more than likely thinking that they are to blame as well. The path to finding "who is at fault" is a long, windy, uphill climb ending in a cliff. Your search for peace and happiness will not be achieved through placing blame on others or yourself. Stop searching for an answer that you will never find. Don't be so hard on yourself. Not everything has a single person to blame.

Don't Let Boys/ Girls Have Power Over You

I know, I know- easier said than done, but this truly is the key. If we stop giving our time to others who don't care then we block off the ability for them to harm us- it's as simple as that. When someone breaks your heart (on purpose or not), the action seems life ending. 

Why do we let boys/girls hold this power over us? 

How can we allow ourselves that think that someone can end our life so easily? 

This person is definitely not the end for you- not even close. He/she is nothing more than a single comma in your book of life- and probably not even an Oxford comma. Yep. I went there. 

This Is Not Forever

It's as simple as that. This is NOT forever. You are not forever alone. You are not doomed out of love. You're still going. You're still breathing. You're still moving. Put your hand to your chest. Take a few deep breaths.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

You feel that? That's a heartbeat: a sure tell sign that you can and will survive this. That boy/girl is not the reason why you have a pulse. You are. Only you can continue on with your life, so get moving.

They don't define you. This situation does not define you. You define yourself. You do not need this one person. There are seven billion people in this world. The idea of needing one person out of seven billion who doesn't care for you sounds a little strange, right?

Hardships Are Inevitable 

If he isn't going to invest time in you then why the hell would you invest in them? 

If he treats you like shit then he is shit. And not THE shit- just shit. Unfortunately, hardships happen. People are going to walk all over you. They are going to screw you over, mess with your life, and not treat you the way you should be treated. You shouldn't be pissed on. You shouldn't mourn over people who'd only ever move a pebble for you in comparison to you moving a whole mountain for them. Girl, you gotta lift your head up, brew a hot kettle of tea, put on some bright red lipstick, and go tackle your day like a champ!  

You Deserve Kindness

Humans deserve kindness. We should expect, and give, nothing less than what we want to receive. If you are being tossed to the curb by a girl or a guy, you are receiving so much less than what you deserve. Kindness is contagious, but so are hate and anger. Avoid and dispose of those who give you anything less than what you deserve. Remove the toxicity and insert some happiness into your life. 

Everyone is going through something. Be more considerate of other people- they deserve kindness too, even the people who shit on you. We all question our lives. We all question where we went wrong, why people leave us, why we develop feelings, how we allow things to happen, and why they always do.

But, don't dwell on it.

Sometimes a person is only but an Oxford comma.